Coping with loss
There are events in life that change you forever. No matter what happens, nothing is ever the same after them. Forest's tragic and sudden demise has been such an event for me. I can't even imagine how somebody so full of life, beauty, energy and exuberance is gone forever. How can fate be so harsh? How will the void caused by Forest's abrupt departure ever be filled - I don't know. As I wrote earlier...there was no cat like Forest. She was so intelligent and adoring - would always be active with her tail up and the big bright eyes full of curiousity and attention - she would meow and purr at the slightest display of affection...and now she is gone for eternity...how will I ever be able to comprehend this I don't know...I can't even bring myself to imagine how scared and alone the poor kitty must've felt as she breathed her last on that hot summer night...and it just tears me up from inside...
But so is life...unforgiving and unpredictable ~ and as humans we have to bear the pain and sorrow that our time on earth brings and just hope that we live it to the best of our ability and when our time comes ~ we are able to move on to meet the ones we love in the eternal world with peace...and so I'll move on - carrying with me great sorrow that only time will heal.
I've been reading the kind and supportive messages from so many wonderful and caring people and I cannot describe how helpful these words have been in lessening the grief. Thank you all for your compassionate comments. They just reaffirm my belief in the inherent goodness of people everywhere. Cat blogosphere is indeed the community of the nicest and most supportive people anywhere. Me and Snow, Leo and Fairy are grateful to have such caring furriends in this difficult time.
I've thought of quitting blogging many times over the last few days ~ but have come to the conclusion that this would be a step in the negative direction. As Forest watches from above ~ she wouldn't want me to go into a shell and break ties with all her wonderful kitty furriends. Also, as I've learned over the past year or so, cat blogging has enabled me to truly appreciate and care for my cats and shower them with the love and attention they deserve. And so Leo, Fairy and Snow will carry on ~ if it hurts too much maybe we'll change the name of our blog...we don't know right now...
Forest's departure has also brought about a change in my outlook on life. Since my graduation from medical school a couple of years back, I've seen most of my friends go abroad for postgraduate training. Meanwhile I've stayed back with my parents here in Pakistan - hoping against hope that somehow things will change and times will take a turn for the better in this country. But now I don't know why but something has broken inside me - I just can't stand this environment around me - maybe it's the memory of Forest that is affiliated with this place - but I feel like choking staying here any more. And so I've begun studying for postgraduate exams to undertake my future training in some decent place where life can be secure and purposeful. It's hard to study right now with all the tears and emotions but I'm somehow managing with the comfort and support of my family and friends - and all of you...
In time we'll return to normal blogging and visiting all of you and thanking you for your kind words and support - please forgive us if we can't do that right away - we are just too shaken right now...see you soon great furriends...
We'd like to thank whoever made this wonderful graphic we copied from somewhere in the cat blogosphere (maybe it was the talented people of Zoolatry...)
Take all the time you need to heal through your sorrow and grief. Leo, Fairy and Snow will be your very best healing balm. They will love you through this difficult time.
We just learned this morning of the loss of beautiful Forest. We are so sadden by this news and our hearts break for you. Do believe that Forest has joined all the ones who came before and is now a kitty angel watching over you with her magical powers. Healing powers. She may be pulling you in a totally different direction than what you had even known. It is good that Leo, Fairy and Snow will be with you to help you overcome this tradegy. We send you our heartfelt purrs....
Abby
Boo
Ping
Jinx
Gracie
and Mom Debra
Omer, it takes time to heal - especially when something so tragic and unexpected happens. You seem to be such a kind and compassionate person, we are so sorry that this has happened. we don't mean to get too philosophical, but perhaps this happened so that you can see that your talents and compassion are needed elsewhere. Forest will be guiding you through this journey as it seems to be her purpose.
As difficult as it may be for you, and we truly share the sadness that is within you... there are words of wisdom in what the Meezers say... it is often so hard at the time, to look forward, and it is not until much later than we can find purpose or reason in tragedies that befall us... yet it is true, that when one door closes another will open. Forest has opened a new door for herself... and perhaps, she is opening one for you.
We just wanted to say that we know you must have a huge pussy cat hole in your hearts, after the lost of sweet Forest.
I think it can take you by surprise, this love that you have for these cats and their loss can be just as painful as other friends and family.
Be kind to yourself and take things easy.
Thinking of you all.
Poppy and Julie Q
You will never get an answer for the 'Why". It just happens. It will hurt for a long time too.
When you feel better, you will be able to remember the happy times.
Celebrate ALL the years she gave you.Do not fixate on the one day she died.
I too,believe she will guide you in life :)
((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))
Purrs Mickey,Georgia, Tillie & the Mom
We just heard the terribly sad news about Forest. We are so sad for your loss and you are in our thoughts. We send you (((((hugs))))) and purrs.
Sorry to hear about Forest. I do hope that you will soon be free from the pain of this incident. Always remember that Forest may not be there beside you but will always be in your heart.
I understand that you will need time to heal from the terrible loss of Forest. I hope that Snow and Leo and Fairy help you find your way to a new path, Omer!
Your buddy, Jimmy Joe
We are so so so so sorry we didn't hear about Forest until this morning. She truly was a magical cat and our hearts break for you. She's watching over all of you now and taking care of you from above.
Love,
Kaze, Latte, Chase, & Lauren
this is so sad dont leve your blog i did when my boy left me we ar all so sorry for youe lost god bless LOA AND BABYS
Oh, Omer, we've been away all weekend and we just learned of the sad news about sweet Forest. Please know that you're in our thoughts constantly and our hearts are with you.
Sharolyn, Suzanne & all the Artsy Catsy kitties
purrrrrrrs, love and hugs to all of you.
We are glad you are not leaving. There is little to say about what you are going on through, only understand that we know how hard.
We were saddened when you mentioned feeling guilty in the last post. Forest was such a loved cat. I cannot imagine that she holds any blame for anything that was done. If she has any regrets for what happened to her, chances are she regrets that you feel so sad and guilty and alone.
You are in our thoughts and prayers. We agree, it seems as if Forest is now leading you from above.
Purrs and love from Missy Blue Eyes, KC, Faith Boomerang, Sol, Smokey and BJ (and Mommie ML, too)
We just heard of the loss of your Forest. We are so very sorry for all of you. Please take your time to heal - the kitty blogosphere will be waiting patiently to hear from Leo, Fairy, and Snow when you are all ready. Take care and know that Forest is in wonderful company with all of the kitties that have come before. Gentle headbutts and purrs to you and your family.
Please accept our condolences on the loss of your darling girl. Having lost 4 cats, I can say with certainty that time will heal your pain, and Forest will always have a special place in your heart.
Charlotte
Crew's Mom
Mommys eyes are leaking again. We all understand the hurt you feel but also know we all will wait for you and the kittys to blog, when the time has come. ((( HUGS )))
Bless you all. I know how difficult it is to lose a beloved furry, and how hard it can be to carry on, but I promise that you will be able to do so. Gandalf and Grayson are right; Snow, Leo, and Fairy will the the ones who will help you recover from Forest's loss. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.
With much love,
Tybalt's Mommy
I am so very sorry for this tragic loss. My heart is broken for you. I know how it feels.
It's so hard to fathom at the time, but all things happen for a reason. It may be this is the push you need to make a better life. Doing so may honor that sweet kitty angel.
You have a lot of good advice heer from a lot of good kitty furrends. You are not alone!
Purrs,
Echo's Mom
I'm so sorry. That is such a tragic, and unforeseen, way to lose your beloved Forest. My condolences to all of you.
You take all the time you need, we will all be here to support you when you are ready to return. Where Forest is, she is happy and she took all your love for her with her. That is all you should think about. She doesn't remember her last moments now, just those wonderful days with you.
Take care and know our hearts and thoughts are with you.
Feeling so desolate is totally natural. You have been through such a huge trauma. That is what makes you special - you know that a cat is not just a cat, and forest was certainly not just any cat! I know she is at peace and and I know that you will meet her again one day. Like you said, time is the only healer. I am sending all my purrs for you and your family xxxx
From Daisy's Mom:
I am so glad you are not giving up blogging, because it would be a double loss for us. Take as much time as you need. Many years ago, I lost a special cat named Haiku from kidney disease. She was only 4 years old. I still recall the terrible sense of loss and sadness and disbelief. I know in time, you will remember Forest with smiles instead of tears.
Healing is a process and everyone's journey is different. We hope you find peace and comfort to help you cope with your loss.
Yes, compassionate Zoolatry did make the graphic. Another blogger added the Blingee.
this is karl's maid charly.
dear omer - i know so well where you are - it seems that anastasia was to me what forest was to you. her parting changed me forever and i still sometimes (almost a year later) can not comprehend that i will never see her in this world again. but the moments that i can look at her picture without crying are getting a bit longer every month and there are more of them. i just cherish the good fortune i had to have known her and to have been a part of her life. she taught me a lot, and even with her death she did. she will always live on in my heart. forest will be a part of you forever and eventually you will be able to just smile at her.
my heart goes out to you, and i am very glad that you decided to go on with the blogging. take your time - we will all be here for you.
lots of love
charly
Thank you for taking the time to share your feelings with the cat blogging community. Take time to grieve. You are still in shock and eventually, time will heal the pain. You will never forget Forest and you shouldn't. My mom truly believes that when one door closes, another opens. May you find the peace that you seek and the guidance to reach your goals! Our special prayers are with you.
Dear Omer, I know it might not mean much to you right now but we still gave you an award. Your creativity and talent is immense, and your contributions to the blogosphere, and especially to the cat blogosphere (how else if not for you would we know about all the wild cousins we are having?)is invaluable!
Whenever you feel like it you can pick it up at your blog (July 14 post).
Karl
Omer, sometimes life us just too too sad and painful. But all your wonderful friends around the world are thinking of you and your furry family, and hoping for peace in your country. I hope this can be a comfort in the midst of your pain. Purrs from Australia!
Omer, our hearts go out to you, and we're glad that you will continue blogging. Forest knew how much she was loved, and she will live forevermore in your heart, her strong spirit always there to guide you. She was a strong, proud and beautiful kitty girl in life; so she will be also in your memories.
Take time to grieve the loss of your precious girl, and take comfort in sweet Leo, Fairy, and Snow. We, your friends on the Cat Blogosphere, are all here for you.
Love and purrs and gentle headbonks from the Ballicai and the Ballicus Mom.
We are very sorry to hear of your tragic loss. People don't understand how hard it is for a human to lose a feline companion.
A lot of doctors from other countries come to Australia to work.
Take all the time you need we understand.Your in our thoughts and Forest is in our hearts forever.
We are so glad to hear you will keep blogging. Take some time to heal, we will be here waiting for you.
Good luck on your studies, and we will purr and purray for a safer place for you to be at in your near future.
Dear Omer, sweet friend. We know your pain. we have also experienced the sudden loss of Caesar and mom has lost her sister 6 years ago. It is a hard blow. Please do not do anything right away. You have a tender heart and it has been beaten badly.
I believe Forest is with Caesar now, and Stormie, and all of the other kitties that went from us.
You have expressed your thoughts so well here, we know your sadness and pain. You feel like you want to die yourself. That is what mommie felt. She could not go on living with out Caesar. Depend on your friends and caring family now. You are a good person Omer. do not push yourself... mommies skate friend that is a psychiatrist told her the same thing. Everyone must grieve, you must and then you might one day see some light.
Do not worry about visiting blogs. right now, just do what makes you feel okay, try to eat properly and sleep. Trust me, Forest is watching over you.
You have us here, if you need anything, just ask for it my friend.
purrs and gentle hugs, Princess and Rosemary
We are so touched by your post, and sending you lots of hugs and purrs right now.
I am touched by your post because I so recognize it. With being cat staff for many many years I know the feeling when somecat goes to the Bridge -- some after illness, others suddenly, one year 2 in one week. It feels like you're in a big black hole, a void of nothingness. But somehow other cats, animals and people pull you out of that void and bring you back to Earth and life.
Forest will always be in your heart and your dreams, and yes, she will be watching over you!!
Love,
Ruis's staff
The pain will lessen with time, and only the wonderful memories will remain. Its an amazing coping mechanism that humans have. Mom, Tara and I are glad you will keep blogging.
Thoughts and purrs
Kavan
Gentle hugs to all you during this difficult time. Forest was well loved and she knew that.
Purrs,
Charlemagne and Tamar
OH! OH! OH! I didn't know! I didn't know! I am soooo purry sorry! I am soooo sad an' sorry. Purrrrrrrrrr. Purrrrrrrrr. Purrrrrrrrr jus' fur you.
Diamond's right, we need more doctors in Australia! And we have cricket here too. And lots of very nice cats... ;)
It appears that this loss has triggered a chain reaction of contemplation. Such a tragic thing alters our view on the world. We purr for comfort and enlightenment for you, Omer.
Cuddles to Fairy, Snow and Leo.
~Goldie and Shade
We are so sorry for your loss. We will miss Forest very much. We only found out about this today, and we are purring for you and for Snow and the others.
~Donny, Marie, Casey
Don't get rid of the blog... even if you never blog on it again... you must NOT give in to the pain, don't destroy these good memories. Hold your other furbabies close- turn your pain into love. Cuddle them like you've never done before. Animals are definitely a good place to go for comfort. They love you- an endless supply of love. And if Forest helped you decide to do something great for yourself- such as moving ahead in life... maybe this did happen for a reason. To get you going- although the reality of how it happened is a terrible thing, maybe your kitty was able to help you in the end? We must always try to see the good in things. Its hard, but we must.
I must let everyone know the sad news- and let them remember forest.
Sad woof's to Forest family...we iz sooo sorry to hear this...My friend Isis blogged about it and we came straight over..not much i can say rite now to help u with ur grief...just no that our angel lacylulu will watch over Forest..i thought about deleting lacy's bloggy, but didnt, we created it in honor of her and it will remain...its gives me comfort...RIP sweet Forest..
a sad,
rocky
bear
angel lacylulu
and their mama, claudette
So sorry to hear about Forest.
You are in our prayers and thoughts.
Lorenza
We're so very sorry to hear about Forest! Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Love ya lots,
Maggie, Mitch and Sue
I feel your pain in reading this post and it brought back all my emotions I had when I lost my Moe cat. Each cat is special and unique and it's very hard to lose them because we get so attached. Take all the time you need, but I'm glad to hear you decided to continue blogging.
We are shocked and saddened by this terrible news. My SS is still in China and we don't get news much. Forest will be sorely missed but one day we shall all meet again. Our thoughts are with you.
Sniffie's Meowmy here,
Losing a furfriend is so hard. We try to do everything we can to keep them safe and healthy, but sometimes it is out of our hands. Forest was a beautiful kitty and I'm sure she knew she was well loved. Don't torture yourself, try to remember the happiness you brought to each other's lives.
Purrs and Headbonks from the Florida Furkids and their Meowmy
I'm so sorry about your loss. Forest was a lovely, beautiful cat.
Rest in peace, baby. You'll never be forgotten!
My mom lost a cat too and the pain was unbearable.
Big hugs to all of you.
Sending our love, and purrs and hugs.
We're glad to see another post on your blog, and it was so moving.
We hope that you keep blogging, so we can get to know your furry family more, and now you have a guardian angel watching over you.
With luv,
Daphne & Chloe & Spooker & Jazper & Little Isis
and Not The Mama, too.
uncle omer,
sometimes awful events spur changes that are healthy. besides being an excellent distraction, consideration of opportunities in other places can be an excellent way to continue to grow.
***
i like to think of forest with suzanne--watching over us. suzanne lets me know she's there when she sends me a penny that i find on the street. my heart smiles with a grin and i carry the penny all day.
with much love and continued purrs,
ben, lucy, toni
I came over from Angel LacyLulu's blog as she had posted about the loss of your beloved friend. I am so, so sorry - your heartbreak is immeasurable. Please know that you are not alone - I, too, lost my kitty sissy very suddenly on Friday - the day before my human's wedding. It is never easy to lose a close fur friend regardless of it is suddenly or not. I know how empty and devastated you must feel - I promise you that time will heal this pain and you will be left with happy memories and the everpresent spirit of your friend.
love,
Toffee
Sorry to hear about your loss. I'm sure you gave Forest a wonderful home and she loved you as much as you loved her.
Levi's mom
Gosh Omer, what you wrote is beautiful and inspiring. I'm so glad that you are going to keep on blogging we would miss Snow, Leo and Fairy so much, just as much as we miss Forest. You have such a beautiful cat family and I know there is a big hole in it right now. After time it won't be as hard as it is right now. Words can be so hollow sometimes but I do pray the God will be with you in your time of grief. You are a special person Omer and I hope your future will be full and rewarding.
We will be purring that your studying goes well. ~Socks, Scylla & Charybdis
I can't purr, but I wish you well in your future endeavors. ~Alasandra
We are very Sorry to hear about Forest. We just can't find the right words to say but please let us have you in our prayers and thoughts.
(((((HUGS)))))
Meowww-oof,
Rudolf & Goofy